How To Help Your Child Struggling With Testing Anxiety
Many students put pressure on themselves to perform well and get good grades. As a parent, you can help your child to alleviate some of this pressure, which can help them feel more relaxed and able to focus on tests.
Remind your child that no matter the grade, your love for them stays constant. You can say, "I appreciate how hard you try on your tests, that's very important, but no matter what grade you get, we will always love you."
Sometimes children think of their grades as a reflection of who they are. Remind your child that they are more than just a grade and everyone experiences disappointments; this is okay, normal, and a part of going to school. One example may sound like, "I know this grade wasn't what you had hoped for. I can see you are disappointed, and that is okay. There's more to you than this grade and I'm here if you need any help."
Children have more control over how much they try on a given test or assignment and less control on the grade they receive. Help your child focus on their efforts in school and less on how they are graded. When children focus on their efforts, they are more likely to persevere after facing setbacks. This can sound like, "I noticed how you stuck with that assignment even when it was hard. That's a great way to deal with challenges and try your best."
Even when children don't obtain the highest score or grade they'd like, they can experience through these reflections that they can have your relationship and care for how they feel. This helps children mourn inevitable losses in ways that are less hard on them and helps them develop the ability to seek support, enjoy their efforts and continue to pursue learning.